Today's video is the first of three "how to's" on practical forgiveness. There is not a more important teaching to couple with "49 Days of Hearing God" because unforgiveness distorts and blocks truth from landing in our hearts.
It literally throws away the keys to the Kingdom that Jesus died to give us.
It's important to note that Kelly Troia's teaching on Matthew 18 and Heart to Heart Personal Prayer Ministry cracked the code for my own understanding of practical forgiveness—you can find her teaching here.
Before you watch today's video, read below for a foundational teaching:
Forgiveness is, hands down, the most misunderstood and least utilized spiritual practice. I believe that if we truly understood forgiveness, not a day would go by that we wouldn’t make it an intentional practice—it's a gift that is FOR us.
Ask Jesus: "Would it benefit me to forgive anyone?"
Trust who God brings to mind. Then, with Jesus, partake in that which cost him the most—forgiveness. The highest price was paid for you to live freely.
For our purposes, let me be clear that I am not talking about interpersonal reconciliation. That is important, but it’s a different process altogether and not the most essential element of forgiveness.
Most essentially, forgiveness is keeping your heart in a free place, letting God's forgiveness flow to you and through you.
In order to understand the potency of forgiveness we have to define what forgiveness is NOT.
Forgiveness is not forgetting. Not once does Jesus tell us to forget. To forgive? Yes—over and over, as much as is possible, without limit. Why? Because forgiveness is FOR YOU and it’s a life-changing gift.
Forgiveness is not just "letting it go"—it is actually the opposite. Forgiveness is taking into account that which has hurt you, come against you, broken harmony, harmed or taken life from you.
Forgiveness is not saying "it’s ok!" or sweeping what harmed you (intentionally or unintentionally) under the rug.
Forgiveness is an actual accounting term—an act of bookkeeping that will settle personal "accounts" rather than leaving them open in such a way that you come up short/lacking, or with "debts" on the books of your life.
What do I mean by debts? I mean that which has taken something from you, hurt or depleted you. That which has cost you. Debts, however small, take life from you—leaving you in a state of being "owed." Debts need forgiving (or repayment). If they are not paid for, they are still on the "books" under the debit column.
Just like an actual bank account needs reconciling (credits and debits correctly entered) in order to balance, you and I need a way of processing life's debts.
Forgiveness is the foundational way of spiritually clearing negative "transactions."
While the word "transaction" can get a bad wrap, the reality is that justice is highly transactional. Justice is the essential underpinning of forgiveness and the need for it. We were made to crave a healthy balance of power: justice. But what do we do when we are wronged? If we are honest, we all desire that what's been wronged be made right. Reconciled. Who wouldn't want restitution?
Forgiveness is not an impotent act of laying down our rights. It is NOT an alter upon which we must sacrifice personal justice. Forgiveness is a powerful act of Kingdom justice.
The most important element to understand about this Kingdom justice system is that there is a lamb who was slain for the sins of the world: all the debt, all the pain, all the ways we break and have been broken, paid for in full.
Our brokenness did not kill Jesus. Jesus chose to lay down His life so that you would not be left looking for someone else to pay for the pain you endured. Looking to another human to pay you back for the harm they inflicted is to live in a delusion, a/k/a "unforgiveness."
Unforgiveness keeps us stuck in pain and blocked from healing. Unforgiveness tells us a false story of justice: that humans can pay us back, and we will not be whole until payback happens.
Forgiveness says payment has been made by the greater party and restitutional healing is available now.
Unforgiveness is a delusional state of believing that someone can go back in time and pay for what they did to you. They simply cannot even if they tried. What’s done is done.
The act of forgiveness, or Kingdom justice, moves you from an impossible, impotent situation (asking a human to pay you back) to the most possible, powerful situation—letting Jesus pay the debt. Was His sacrifice enough to cover what others owe you? Was it enough to cover what you owe yourself?
When you asked Jesus who it would benefit you to forgive, whom did He bring to mind?
Now ask: "Jesus, help me make a list of what this person owes me." (Looking at what is owed to you, the debts that have accrued, is important. Otherwise, all you are doing is sweeping pain under the rug and denying your own internal need for just living).
Picture those debts as a chain connecting you to the person who owes you. It’s heavy. Take it off the person's shoulders and place it completely onto Jesus. His broad shoulders can handle it. In fact, they were torn to shreds for it years ago.
Simply state, "I forgive you—I release you from this debt that you owe me—I’m going to let Jesus pay. What He paid is more than enough."
Now that you no longer are tied by the weighty burden of debt to that person, make a choice right now to look solely to Jesus for repayment, healing and restitution. He is willing and able.
You have just accepted the freedom Jesus paid such a high price for—well done! Watch for shifts to happen for the good in your life as you live forgiven and, therefore, forgiving.